i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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