Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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