That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Randomize
