The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
My Sexting was not on an AP level
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
