Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize
