Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize