I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Panties = found
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
