I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
where are you?
Hypothermia
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
