Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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