saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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