people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
