I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
