ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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