Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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