And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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