It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
