I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
