I want to walk on stilts...naked
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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