so explain again why im purple
no
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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