My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Girls should come with a carfax report
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
