turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
