More tranny stories later!
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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