I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
