the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
