you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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