YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
