Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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