I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
