I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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