do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
