I only kidnapped one of them. chill
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
