you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
