I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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