how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
as a side note pls kill me
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
