guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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