we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Actions speak louder than pants.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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