i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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