You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
