her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
How drunk are you?
Completed.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize