nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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