And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
