if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
