I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize