I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
we have officially lost it.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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