Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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