Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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