ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
