Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
