literally had 100 drinks last night.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
