You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
